I don't care if this is vague, rife with metaphor, or even just simply too honest. I don't care if it's read or not. There are no tags, there is no title.



It's introspection, and the only thing that concerns me is that it needs to be out of my head NOW.

The thing I miss most isn't the friendship.
It isn't the kisses, the cuddles, the feel of you against my skin.
It isn't the talking, or the looking into your eyes - hell, it isn't even the sex.

I miss being able to close my eyes and feel -you.- The you inside, underneath, I'd call it the soul.
Your soul, right there beside mine, no matter how alone I felt. I could hold you, and it meant more than just flesh and warmth.

Is it seriously so old-fashioned and archaic to want a spark like that back?
At this point I'd settle for a glimmer, some dim little straw to grasp at so I can believe I'm still capable of feeling it.
That spark...that tiny little spark that means I'd tear the world to pieces for you.

What I want, all I want, is to find that absolute beauty within the chaos. The eye of the hurricane, the core of the tornado, the center of the flames.
Pure beauty, untainted. I want to find that, and touch it with another soul. Even if it's only for a moment. 

Is that too much?
If it is, I don't want any part in this place anymore.

- C